Thursday, October 15, 2009

Pondering Luck...

I am writing this with tiny weenie bit of resentment and also in an attempt to let go of this incessant same piece of shit defilement that existed in my head which has been bothering me since beginning of year. i.e. unhappiness. I’ve finally decided it’s stupid and unnecessary and I wanted to be free. Free from the discontentment from being judged.

Recently, I have been judged and found pitiful that I am having extreme bad luck and now going through the lowest point in life (or so they thought) therefore it was concluded that I have lost all my senses, conscience and direction to life, despite 30 years of incessant education and self improvements, and have had hopelessly became a mannequin that is under control by some evil forces.

That’s not the worst comment I've ever heard in my life. Listening to harsh comments due to misconceptions and shallow minds are all part of EVERYONE’s life. I’ve heard it all. Especially for an eccentric person like me who always strives to be outright different. I was always being criticised for being nice and sweet to all. They say I am a slut because “she reads english books”. Haha! That’s really absurd. Well, back to the point. However, to be hearing this kind of comments coming from the people you thought trusted and understand you the most has the same impact of a ‘cultural shock’.

A very BIG question mark shoots up above one’s head following these 3 letters W H Y.

Yes, this BIG WHY? has been bothering for so long.  WHY? the people I always find comforts in… can suddenly have a complete NEGATIVE understanding of me as if they have never known me before? I didn’t know, the belief in LUCK is so important that it can break a relationship just as bad as money matters. For the life of me, I’ve never thought that’s possible.

First of all, the question falls on: What is Luck? and why others assume luck can play such a role in determining one’s happiness and success. We all pretty much have an idea of what luck is. However, its very definition is as abstract as asking the innocent question : what is Love?

Don’t we all, for all of our entire life, been doggedly searching for the impossibility of true LOVE, GOOD LUCK and SUCCESS? Little do we ever think that they are all subjected to one’s understanding for the true meaning of life and what constitute happiness. Depends of your religion and upbringing, luck can generally be understood as the followings:

  1. Luck is god's gift. Now, by god I mean, something you cannot control. Luck presents itself with no invitation, or rather it doesn't even show by invitation at all! ha! 
  2. Luck is your own doing. A good example of the own doing of bad luck is, you have very bad temper and pisses everyone's off. You don't get to share the cake, because nobody likes you. Eventually, your 'good luck' for enjoying a nice piece of Durian cake for the day is automatically disqualified. This is an example of man-made luck. Another example is one has no control of his/her own wicked mind. Or no, let’s say a person with a restless mind who’s rushing to a meeting with his mind all occupied about the argument last night with his girlfriend and at the same time trying to cross a road and has the ‘bad luck’ of being hit by a car. Is this bad luck? No, careless is not at all bad luck, OK???

Of course, the above 2 is too general an explanation to luck.

What I really do believe in is, there’s no such thing as luck. There’s only ‘the condition’.

Why?

Nature does work in a miraculous way, but certainly not in a random mini mine more way. There is a hidden formula beyond the comprehension of our 6-7 inches humanly brain, in any chance, that this formula is understood and mastered, we are already a free man and no longer under the governing of this rule, or so I thought.

There’s a bit of nature, a bit of your own doing and a bit of other people’s doing. That is what I understand as luck. I also believe, if you work really really really hard with all your might, all the time, and with a selfless heart and attained mindfulness, nature really does work together with you in harmony. Reason? That’s the chord that nature plays!

God whispers to you the moment your mum brought you to this world, here, this is the inventory (your body) and condition (your family) I give to you, carry on and pave our own path, I am busy.

Let’s forget about the question why god gives him more and less to you. This is the same stupid LOVE question. Just consider the fact that, did you use your inventory and condition the right way? And AHA, can you see now? The point is what is “the right way”!???

Play any deadly addictive Facebook Playfish apps, then you will know what I mean. Restaurant City, Country Story…etc. You have to take care of the game your own way. You can never die in these games… only how you sustain it. And there’s no way to judge, whether you are ‘dead’ in these games, only abandonment. And no one can say you are ‘dead’. Certainly, nobody can claim their restaurant is better than others none other then the voting of all other anonymous users (your friends are not allowed to vote for you).

There’s no absolute “right way” agreeable to all.

So, at the end of the day, what I wanted to say is to judge and assume others having BAD LUCK, or not enjoying good life, or not choosing the correct spouse, or has nothing in life, or any eye rolling regarding other’s people life based on limited understanding and firm grasp on the true nature of life or happiness, is as bad as saying “my restaurant in Facebook is better than yours.

I rest my case.