Even The Elephant Will Climbest The Tree, If Thou Can Find A Lady in Mountain East

I had to skip work again to go make my student visa this morning. The LAO SHI 老师 (thou shalt call everyone a teacher here and thou shalt not call a female a Miss, lest thou will get slapped on thy face) brought me to the relevant government body and GEE... Mountain East lady females are one scary species that they deserve a blog later on when I manage to get more scary pictures of them.


So my bro and sis, is she scarier or me your jiam jiam?

It was exactly noon time when I finished applying for my visa so I got back to the university and decided to pay the bookshopt a visit. It is near the local student dormitory and I saw the crowd walking back to their dorm after/for lunch.



How do you think their dormitories look like? A bit like Perkeliling, I say.



I bought some real good books for a cheap price considering the fact that I bought my RMB using Ringgit. Very happy!



By the way, our Ah Niu 阿牛 is doing very well in China .



Yes, our very own made in Malaysia singer! Well, almost, as it's a Taiwanese record company that really made him a star. Shandong radio is playing this everyday, even the TV won't leave me alone. They are trying to brain wash everyone into silly frogs

My First Broadband Connection

Does he look tall to you?

I finally got round to talking to our Shandong ISP over the phone and they understood me and I understood them so they came over and installed ADSL for me. It's 100 Mbps and costs RMB 40 per month. Cheap or not? I tested the speed this morning following James' advise, it's about 412.9 kilobits per second.

This is my first ever broadband connection you know! Haha... Makas aka Mr Carrot said I'm a loser. Wei, I never had to get one wah, it's always been free for me!

When you are all by yourself in some land called Mountain Hole East, no reason is too small to get over excited about, so this is what I cooked to celebrate my first day of getting online.



Stir-fried lotus 莲藕 and chinese parsley 芫荽 with wolfberries honey 枸杞子蜜! Ha... I know, it sounds pretty weird but it's delicious, ok? How often can you find a light dish that smells like fragance and tastes like love that soothes your throat at the same time? It is perfect for summer. You can try cooking this for your boy-friend and he will fly. Must put some nicely roasted pork or chicken, ok?


Yeng's little tips:

• Lotus: Did you know that lotus was from India? Good for you reducing heat in your body. Don't they talk about detox programme all the time and try to make you buy NEWLY discovered and EXPENSIVE supplement for you to detox your rusty body? Well, here's one for you from me. Just think how lotus is grown and you will know why. You can't? Oh well, someone once said genius is a celestial spark granted only to an elite few. I guess it's true! ha!
  
  Make fresh juice out of it for your daddy, brother, hubby or child if they are under the heaty weather or have sore throat. Add some honey to make it easier to drink.
  
  


• Chinese parsley: Good for almost EVERYTHING, except that some people are allergic to it. It aids digestion. The Japanese are crazy about it. Rule of thumb : Anything that adis digestion will promote longevity (© copyright yengfong 2006). Chinese parsley is one herb that you must try to eat fresh everymeal if you want to have healthy stomach and beautiful skin. It has anti-cancerous property as well. Pick the short and expensive one with sharp pleasant smell. My housemate Tay says it costs about RM3 for a little bunch.
  
  
• Wolfberries: Grab a handful and drink as tea everyday all you computer freaks! The orange colour indicates that it's an 'active' fruit thus it has a great BU 补 property. It means, it's good for generally weak people as it promotes better blood circulation.
  
  According to TCM (Traditional Chinese Medicine) theories, if you use your eye too much for reading, it's very bad for your blood. Chinese wolfberries belongs to the Liver and Kidney meridiens and because your eye is somehow connected to your liver (the blood relation), so wolfberries are good for your eye. Well, if you look at it from the nutritional value point of view, it is high in Vit A, so TCM and Western Medicine is just 2 ways of looking at the same thing... well, almost. I believe the Chinese can SEE more. :-)
  
  

Shopping at Walmart?

I left work early today because my doctor for the day is quite a 'reserved' person who doesn't like to share her experience much. Sometimes, you could only be good at one thing not all. So she's a good doctor, not a good teacher. I totally get it.

Anyway, so I went roaming around town. My Malaysian classmates told me there's a Walmart here so I went to look-look! :-) Oh my, the supermartket is big! They should really call it a hypermarket. But heck, was it Walmart at all? Where's the sign? Err... whatever, as long as I could get what I wanted.

Since I wanted to cook dinner, I couldn't shop for long, I went straight to the noodle section and oh my, I nearly got lost. There are too many brands and no one to tell me which one is the best! It's time like this I wish my mum is here.




There are basically 2 huge rows for instant noodles






Jay Chow noodle for you. I saw a lot of teenagers buying these. :-)


Monk-Jump-Over-the-Wall flavour.

I think I looked too much like a KAMPUNG girl who's never seen noodles before our sour faced sales assistant came over and told me that no camera is allowed on the shop floor. Feeling mischievous, I told her that I'm sorry, I didn't know. It just that I'm a blogger from XXXX (insert a country) and have never seen so many noodles in my life before, I'd like to show it to my ULU friends at home. And she was like "??????". Hehehe.., isn't it nice to be able to say silly things in a town where nobody knows you?

I then ventured to the hair care section.

I developed drandruff since the 1st day I arrived in Jinan. I blame it on the water and the dry weather. Since I'm not feeling daring enough to try any of the funny and unknown brands of shampoo here, I've decided to go for one that is recommended by the only person I know in China - Mr Jackie Chan. I kept seeing Jackie Chan on my TV set telling me how good this BAWANG chinese herbal shampoo is, so I decided to give it a try. (Will tell you if it works later- it better be!)





Some Engrish for you. Click on image to enlarge. :-)

I also bought a pack of healthy drink that costs RMB 26. It's considered expensive. But what can I do? it's really hard for me to choose from rows and rows of cereal drink. All the packaging is nice and attractive. MANA SATU????? So I ended up buying the one printed with the most lines of English on it. ha!



When I got out of the supermarket. It was already 6pm.



But our sun was still way up in the sky making its bold statement of appearance. I walked over the park to get to the bus station. To my delight, I found one of my favourite flowers: the pansy! :-)



Pansy is called the smiling face. Can u see why? It is to guide the butterflies and the bees to the pollen in the middle. It is also a flower to give to your lover. Oh, lovely pansy! I felt so happy!

I also bumped into a girl conducting a survey.




Then I strolled through some willow trees.



And saw a young couple.



I waited for the bus for half an hour and drenched in my own sweat. Not knowing if I've got the right bus stop plus feeling lazy to communicate/mime, I waved my hand, and woala, a cab stopped right in front of me and so I hopped into it.

Our cab driver, no ALL DRIVERS, in Shandong love to honk. They honk and honk and honk for no reason. They honk when they make a turn, when the car in front is too slow (or not slow)... they will honk and honk NON-STOP. What is wrong with them?! Their thumb is forever stuck on the honk.



I got home safe and felt eager to try the sweet potato noodle I bought from the supermarket.



I cooked it in my tomato soup for 10 minutes and this is how it looks like. :-) It's quite alright, it felt like eating rubber bands. lol

Who is it?

Got this from my Indonesian friend Lisa:

George W. Bush meets with the Queen of England. He asks her,
"Your Majesty, how do you run such an efficient government? Are there any tips you can give to me?"
"Well," says the Queen, "The most important thing is to surround yourself with intelligent people."
Bush frowns. "But how do I know the people around me are really intelligent?"
The Queen takes a sip of tea. "Oh, that's easy. You just ask them to answer an intelligence test. Listen to this".

The Queen pushes a button on her intercom. "Please! send Tony Blair in here, would you?"

Tony Blair walks into the room. "Yes, Your Majesty?"

The Queen smiles. "Answer me this, please, Tony. Your mother and father have a child. It is not your brother and it is not your sister. Who is it?"

Without pausing for a moment, Tony Blair answers, "That would be me."

"Yes! Very good," says the Queen.

Back at the White House, Bush asks to speak with Vice President Dick Cheney. "Dick, answer this for me. Your mother and your father have a child. It's not your brother and it's not your sister. Who is it?"

"I'm not sure," says the Vice President. "Let me get back to you on that one."

Dick Cheney goes to his advisors and asks everyone, but none can give him an answer. Finally, he ends up in the men's room and recognizes Colin Powell's shoes in the next stall.

Dick shouts, "Colin! Can you answer this for me? Your mother and father have a child and it's not your brother or your sister. Who is it?"

Colin Powell yells back, "That's easy. It's me!"

Dick Cheney smiles. "Thanks!"

Cheney goes back to the Oval Office to speak with Bush. "Say, I did some research and I have the answer to that riddle. It's Colin Powell."

Bush gets up, stomps over to Dick Cheney, and angrily yells into his face, "No, you idiot! It's Tony Blair!"

More Salt for You, My Dear?

I cannot stress enough how hot the weather is right now so I'm justing gonna bug you by saying the word hot, hot, hot and hot a hundred times.

HOT HOT HOT HOT HOT HOT HOT HOT HOT HOT HOT HOT HOT HOT HOT HOT HOT HOT HOT HOT HOT HOT HOT HOT HOT HOT HOT HOT HOT HOT HOT HOT HOT HOT HOT HOT HOT HOT HOT HOT HOT HOT HOT HOT HOT HOT HOT HOT HOT HOT HOT HOT HOT HOT HOT HOT HOT HOT HOT HOT HOT HOT HOT HOT HOT HOT HOT HOT HOT HOT HOT HOT HOT HOT HOT HOT HOT HOT HOT HOT HOT HOT HOT HOT HOT HOT HOT HOT HOT HOT HOT HOT HOT HOT HOT HOT HOT HOT HOT HOT

It was quite entertaining at work today despite the hot weather outside as we've got a few under 3 babies in. They were all smart babies that can name all the medication they are undertaking. You don't really read pulse for toddler under 3 but they insisted so we had to please them a bit... haha. The room was filled with laughters and made everyone's day! Boy, sometimes children can be such amusement.



This boys is 4. I like this teacher the best because he's very friendly and a real master. The radio talks about him all the time! And he's the only teacher that doesn't mind sharing his remedies.

It was a long afternoon with lots of patients. So it's no surprise that I was very hungry near dinner time. I met up with my Malaysian colleagues and these were the food we ordered:



Weather was hot, so we always have watermelon as appetizer. When it was served, everyone grasped a piece like it's the life-saver. We bought this one for RMB 6 to share between 8 of us. I tend to feature this classmate of mine because he doesn't mind getting photographed. :-)



The first dish to arrive is tofu and pig intestine (sorry adhy and faiz). At last, they ordered something new! The tofu and pig intestine was piping hot and very soft, such a nice touch on your tongue. Lots of vegetable were hidden behind, e.g seaweed, the transparent green bean noodle, tofu skin and etc. The only thing is, once you start drinking the soup you know that it's not the whole pot of salt that they've put in but Ajinomoto instead.



Our usual dish. The vegetable is alright, most of the greeny leaves were removed and the mushrooms, as you can see, but cannot taste, is soaked in a bed of tongue-killing-of-top-of-the-world-level salty sauce. We should really start naming Shandong food as Fish-Jump-Over-the-Wall because t's so salty that even the fish had to jump over the wall and die.



This is the best dish among all. The chicken was cooked wrapped inside the lotus leaf and the meat is tender and tasty. Boy, I was happy. We were surprised to find glutinous rice inside. But, too bad, it's also too salty.



Yes, this is the popular TANG CU LI JI sweet and sour shredded meat. Nothing is out of the ordinary nice about this dish except that it's sweet and sour and NOT salty. I don't really like the meat texture because it's chewy and got stuck between my teeth all the time!

CONCLUSION: Shandong food is so salty that I'm starting to think this could be a conspiracy against us Malaysian. Yes, let's kill these little multi-lingual bastards from the south by over dosing them with salt!

Siao! Crazy!

They Are Still Up There

Gosh, still no news from my Malaysian colleagues. Can't wait to see the photographs they've taken.




Today is still an eat-myself day (sek ji gei). I've decided to steam the healthy mixed rice (Ba Bao Fan) I bought from the market few days ago. It was RMB 2.50 for 500gm.

It all turned kind of purple-ish after 45 minutes of steaming. There iss no way I'm going to swallow this purple coloured rice, so I decided to use my iron wok to stir fried it a bit to give it a good shake of Qi! (ha!)



It turned out absolutely delicious. I didn't put any salt or soya sauce since I will get enough supply of salt for probably another 100 years for eating 8 months of Shandong food. So, it's just natural taste of rice, beans, meat, mushrooms and asparagus flavours of which are enchanced by the crunchy seaweed pickles (the very green thing in the picture). So healthy! Now I know why Jamie Oliver's call the naked chef. It just mean not over dressing your food with too much unnecessary artificial flavourings and bring out the natural goodness of your food.

Having said that, a lot of people health conscious people thought that being natural and healthy means not putting anything to your food, but it really is more than that, you need to know the temperature, texture of each food and what goes with what. Or else it will just turn out to be the usual unappertizing pot of porridge for your doggie. But heck, my sister and brothers always think that my cooking is a pain to eat anyway.



It really is my turn to appear in one or two pictures. Do you guys miss me? So do I look fatter or thinner? Do I look more like someone with a healing hand? I do sleep very well in Jinan. I go to sleep like a baby every night. I usually sleep well on a single bed, I wonder why.



As usual, I am going to wash my delicious meal down with a cup of nicely brewed chinese herbal tea. It's hawthorn berries, Shen Qu(don't know what it is in English), malt and mandarin skin.

My Malaysian Colleagues Have Gone to Climb Tai Shan

My Malaysian colleagues arrived Jinan in April. In the duration of 3 months time, they have already visited the Confucian Temple to see Confucian's home, The Jinan Botanical Garden to see the beautiful cherry blossom, The Bao Tu Spring Garden to drink the ever refreshing spring water, Qing Dao ( a very modern city island more impressive than Japan) and now, Tai Shan. I really wanted to join them but heck I just arrived and I'm already scratching my brain cells everynight trying to figure out what's happening in the hospital and researching on all the herbal remedies. I would feel really guilty going for fun at the moment.

But... but... Tai Shan is a great mountain! I mean, Tai Shan literally means the Almighty Mountain. I wish I can go later, perhaps I can persuade some of you to come in Autumn to climb it. It's only 30 minutes away from Jinan, I heard. After all, it is the mountain that every emperor has to climb to prove his mightiness. I saw some really awesome pictures of that place, that is one mountain I want to conquer before I leave China.

Well, since my heartless buddies are all gone, my Taiwanese friend suggest that we go spend the morning at the Jinan textile market to buy a bedsheet set since I haven't got one. We left at 8 a.m. and took a 30 min bus ride.

The textile market is a neat and colourful market where you feel like sleeping on all these soft and colourful fabrics.



We only ventured in the bedroom fabric sections where I could choose my own design and to custom make one with a marked down price. After rounds and rounds of hunting, I finally settled for these 3.

To make a single sized duvet cover, one pillow case and a bed sheet. RMB 56 including craftmanship. What a deal! My mum would be so proud of me! haha


After I've chosen my bedset, the lady told us she needed some time to do the sewing, so we walked around some more and found some 'stalls' selling sky-dropping price fabric. Most of them are about RMB 12 for 3 metres. 100% cotton.



Soft and colourful fabrics for making clothes. RMB 12 per metre. Slightly more expensive but still cheap.

When we returned to the store at which I got my bedset, the lady was so busy we had to help her out...


We left the textile market noon time and got back to the university and had lunch at a small restaurant. We both ordered a small bowl of seafood noodle and it took 30 min to come, in the duration of which, I've counted, they have already served up to 10 dishes to the other 3 tables. My friend told me that in China, you've got to order a lot or else they won't entertain you. It's called big and small eye. (Think Cantonese and Mercedes Benz) So, in China, for 2 people, you have to order at least 4 main giant dishes, even though you know that you will never going to finish it. Wasting the food is better than losing your face. Heck, isn't that crazy?

Satisfied with my morning trip. I've decided to treat myself with Yeng's delicious cooking for dinner. (!)

Bamboo chopping board! I'm sure Felicia would like one. ha!

This is what I'm going to cook. All these ingredients cost not more than RMB 2. Yes, it's asparagus, and yes, it's Kampung egg, and yes, fresh shitake mushroom! Garlic and tomato is so cheap it's virtually free. It's RMB 2 because the cut of meat costs RMB 1. Just so you know, tomato is the king of fruit in Shandong (awarded by myself). I can't tell you how juicy it is. You just need to add a little bit of water, and these 2 tomatoes will be enough to make a bowl of comfort soup.


I borrowed my friend's electric stove and used my legendary iron wok, which I bought for RMB 69, for the first time. To give it a good start, I have conditioned the wok the day before with peanut oil. The stove gets heated up incredibly fast that water will boil in 2 minutes. No joke. The wok weights a hefty 3 kg so it's virtually impossible for me to hold or toss or pour with one hand. But then, the thought of all the possible minerals I could benefit from this wok keep me smiling when wok-ing. Cheers!

Whoala, this is my dinner. No meal is complete in Shandong without a nice Man Tou (dumpling). (This one looks purple because it's made of black rice. )


Ey, ey... don't forget my cup of romantic flower tea.

Jinan's Pasar Malam

I stay near a 'high street' called Wen Hua Dong Lu. I wasn't feeling well today so I didn't go to work, as a result of which I will not be joining my colleague for our usual get-together dinner. Feeling hungry, I ventured out to the Friday night market, only then I realised how happening it is.





One thing I kept noticing is, most of the food here look suspiciously familiar. For one thing, the diet here is mostly wheat based. So, it's no suprise that they can also came out with something the Indian did.



The Shandong roti canai is crispy and aromatic. So, please, the very next time you feel too eager to take your fellow mainland visitor to a nearby Mamak store for a piece of self-acclaimed KL delight: THINK TWICE. Your visitor will probably roll his/her eyes and think that:" Cheh, the one in Shandong is much better!"



Well, I've introduced the steamed bun already. It's also a popular food here. Behold my friend, this whole lot is probably just enough for one Shandong stomach.



Don't you just love the colours of these little umbrellas? The blue one at the top (the biggest one) is selling for RMB 5.


Oh, look at these cute little.... tigers aka cats... or whatever.




What do Shandong girls care about the most? It will have to be their hairstyle. Hair saloons are everywhere. They open till 11pm at night and very cheap. A high tech perm + wash + cut cost only RMB 30. I have to admit though, they do have better looking hair than KL girls. Their curls are really nice and naturally! ( Shame! )



I was too busy walking around I've forgotten to buy me dinner. Luckily, on my way back, I bumped onto this uncle selling what the direct translation would be: Fried Dough/Cookie/Cake. Whatever. It's really delilcious despite the fact that I have to "Ey?" 3 times everytime the uncle asked me a question or try to talk to me. The cake itself is soft profusing with the aroma of corn and the center is crunchy with a hint of salted fish. The chinese parsley here is aromatic and appertising. Cost: RMB 1.50



The tea flowers are probably the most rewarding discoveries of the day from the night market. I bought 150gm for RMB10 (if I remember correctly). Now, if you ask me, it's jaw-dropping cheap. You would probably be paying more than 100 Ringgit Malaysia for this amount in KL, OK? For the last I know, 30 buds of roses are gonna cost you 15-20 Ringgit. What's more, I've got Carnation, Immortelle and Saffron. Ladies, these flowers go straight to your liver and hence 'cleanse' your blood and are good for your face and hormone!